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Intimidated by SymbiansDear Seska, A friend of mine recently received a Sybian as an aniversary gift from her husband of 25 years. She couldn't wait to show it to me and began a full court press to get me to try it out. I was frankly afraid of the thing and told her under no circumstances would I straddle that thing. She was convinced that this device would deliver an orgasm to me which I don't think I have ever had. Since I refused to play, my friend started a video tape from the manufacturers of the Sybian,. The video explained how they developed the Sybian, the positive health and sexual aspects of using the Sybian, but what impressed me most was their claim that most non-orgasmic women could learn to have orgasms with the Sybian and often transition into a normal sex life with their spouses. My question? Can a toy really have this kind of effect? I have become somewhat tempted to try the Sybian after watching the women in their video reach orgasm. How can I expect my husband to act about using a toy like the Sybian? Tempted and confused One of the benefits sex toys such as a Symbian is the intense vibration they provide. They are precise and powerful. Orgasms in women are nearly always triggered by stimulation, direct or indirect, to the clitoris and many vibrators can do so in a way that human touch cannot. Symbians are large devices with powerful motors, but you can also get incredible results from smaller, more practical and less expensive sex toys. Two popular ones - the Hitachi Magic Wand and the Pocket Rocket. Some household objects such as a shower massager or the bath tub faucet can also be used to provide stimulation. If you are intimidated or inexperienced I suggest you do some research before you invest in a sex toy. An excellent resource on the female orgasm, specifically how important the clitoris is and especially for those having difficulty having one, is the work of Betty Dodson. Check out her website for more information. As for what kind of response your husband will have with you using a Symbian, that depends on his perceptions of sex toys, your relationship with him, his sense of self, his thoughts on masturbation, and how he sees sex in general. It is relatively common for people to be intimidated by sex toys. They worry that people who use them will become dependent on them for orgasm or that they will become a substitute for the interpersonal and intimate nature of sex between people. Get one Betty Dodson's books and talk to him. Remember that it is important that you take ownership over your own sexual pleasure, but that enjoying it with a partner is also very valuable. Seska Lee |
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